Typical

Oh the reality! I attempted to try to make something of expressing myself on a regular basis to find some meaning behind the word "life"... and about four months later; here we are again. However, life has dealt me a new hand from my original blog. I look back at it now and wouldn't want to change anything about it. Everything still stands accurate, the only difference is now I have the inspiration to actually want to get out of bed. I'm accepting what path I have chosen for my life to truly start on and I get a rush of excitement and stress all at the same time. It's perfect! The challenge to find a comfort zone for the future, but yet living every single day to it's most fulfilling moments! Fuck!! What a rush!

I really wish I could just layout a calendar here and just fill it in so you can understand where life is taking me. My "love life" has been shifted to a different time of life. It's not right for me now, but unfortunately that means a divorce with a shit load of papers and a hellishly long waiting period that reminds you every morning that you are going through it will be hitting me now. It's ok though! It was my decision and I am at peace with it and in the long run it will be the better decision then staying in the current because I was too lazy to deal with the papers. It will be worth it for the both of us in the end. I'm finding now that part of trying to figure out what I wanted out of life was becoming complicated because it wasn't just my own, but someone else as well. Then there was that stupid revelation that haunts everyone in my family. The first husband never sticks and the first wife always ends up bitch... the Tanglao curse. Da da daaaa!! Well, as for their superstitions, at least I had a rational explanation for my request to dissolve my marriage. I'm not going to get into it now, but know that it was my choice and yes, we had a very great relationship and he is a wonderful person... but, we didn't really know each other and I wasn't really in love and bottom line is I feel that God didn't make us for each other, but came close. It may have been one of those convenience things. Gggrrr... all of the reason to life my life a little more recklessly and satisfying instead of safe and stable.

I'm going to move soon. Where? Not sure, but I have some great friends that are willing to help out with things along the way! This is the great thing, my primary job is in Portland, but all of my family and the jobs that really make me money are in LA. So, I am commuting (yes, by plane, not by car) back and forth every other week now. Sure it's only a two hour flight, but your never in one place long enough to call it home. Ah! Idea... crash pads!! (Don't you just love all this airline lingo?!) How freakishly exciting?! There is no place to call home because you end up getting into this transition where the world is starting to become your home! You have your personal items at all the locations. How freeing! Come and go as you please, anywhere you want, where the only person you need to worry about directly is... yourself! So, now no established address to fill in on the permanent address boxes of applications and the mailing address... a relatives I guess. LOL!! I can't even belive I'm really going to do this! It's just as freaking crazy as my cousin up and moving to the "motherland" and beyond! Wow!! I get to be a part of that now, so I need to make the most of it while I still can.

It's all just so amazing that no matter where I end up there is only one thing that's certain... My everyday 22.